The lost post 2013 …funny that it rings true 4 years later

I’m sure I’m not the only person who goes through this and comes out the other side with a renewed sense of appreciation, with a greater understanding of life and it’s value and a huge appetite to live, really live, I mean really, really live. To me being diagnosed with cancer has woken be back up to reality and given me the greatest of opportunities, life lessons and new friends. I making this sound a positive experience that people may think wow – that sounds like a great idea, I’ll just have a little bit of cancer and I’ll sort my life out. I wish !!  The darker side of Cancer is no laughing matter and I’m not even tempted to dwell there, no conversions to Lord Vader for me !!

The definition I promote of positivity is making the best of any situation. That’s an accurate description of how I’ve embraced life since my diagnosis. If you approach life with this attitude sure things may rock your boat but they can’t capsize you. I’m constantly humbled by other people’s experiences and how they overcome far greater obstacles or difficulties in life, I’m not belittling my own experiences but can acknowledge others have a harder path than I do. One thing comes to my mind, I want to live life as fully as possible for all of us at some stage or other will be weakened and need help & assistance, we never know when that will be, so enjoy all that you can do whilst you can and fear not the unknown.

Yesterday I was back running, for the first time since chemo, and felt proud of the achievement – I was running with a new friend, both of us still receiving radiotherapy and I remarked (breathing out of my ass) that sure I’ve got a good way to go to improve my fitness  (not say get back – as we move forwards) but the fact we were out running in the grey & rainy mornings after going through this treatment was a good thing in itself, when others struggle to motivate themselves without the chemical warfare inside of them. 

I feel proud of myself lately, not just for enduring chemical cosh, but for actively helping myself which in turn helps others. Funny how we are conditioned that we shouldn’t brag of  our achievements , but in contrary I read a blog the other day that said being proud of yourself isn’t egotistical or loving yourself isn’t conceited. I’m truly learning to love myself it’s taken a long while.

Loving yourself is not conceited. It is as much about self-care and fulfillment as taking a long bath, or treating yourself to a purchase you have earned with your own hard work. It is simply a moment of happiness you bring to yourself, confidence you draw from within by whichever means you deem necessary.

Over time I’ve read many self-development books, articles and blogs. The Law of Attraction always provokes questions in my mind. I have issues with that in relation to sickness, ill-health or tragic events, no one actively sits and thinks about them, it also says the things we worry about happening may also be drawn to us as that’s where our thoughts lay. Now this is a bit different as we do worry about health, losing someone, money, etc …I’m not suggesting that our mind is so powerful that by simply thinking of these things they happen or I’m sure the population would be lower after every time someone wishes someone dead if they have been hurt by them or multiple people would be married to the same celebrities!  


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